was not attracted to her boss. But she questioned herself. Was she really the problem? For months she lived with the cognitive dissonance of implicitly trusting her boss and also knowing she was good at her work and should not have it stripped from her. The incident leading to the collapsed state I met her in was when she tried to get help from her organization. She went to a high-level leader, a woman, believing that a more experienced woman would know what to do. She told this woman what she experienced, and the woman responded, “That must be so hard for [boss],” empathizing with his feelings of rejection rather than recognizing that his impact on Hall’s career was the real harm. Another senior leader told Hall her problems were really all about competition with the woman who was now getting Hall’s work. Rather than seeing that Hall’s boss was engaging in classic quid pro quo sexual harassment and making Hall’s job dependent on her willingness to be sexualized, her superiors characterized Hall as aggressive and competitive for seeking help. She managed her boss’s harassment for years, but it was her organization’s response that finally pushed her to become the shaky, frail woman, hiding under covers and dreaming of just being able to go to work. Not only had she experienced the betrayal of being punished in her work because she did not share her boss’s feelings, but now her organization believed she was the bad guy. Over a year later, Hall reminded me of our initial consultation call. She said, “Do you remember when we first met and you asked me what an ideal outcome would be?” I knew I always asked that question, but I only had a vague memory of our conversation. She reminded me that she told me getting out of bed and getting to work seemed like a stretch. She said, “I remember you said to me, ‘What about leading the organization? It’s possible at some point you could do that!’” She laughed and told me her thought at the time was, “Well, this girl is crazy, but at least it seems like she’ll help me.” We both laughed because at that point she created her own successful program within the organization and was considering applying for a leadership role. Now, many years later, she is delivering keynote presentations based on the work that inspires her and making a huge, tangible impact on the world. And what happened to Hall’s old boss? He’s probably fine. He retired around the time that Hall settled her claims against the organization. His fragility was only one component of Hall’s growth. See Holding Space for Growth After Trauma p. 16 15 Trial Lawyer | Fall 2024
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